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Monday 25 May 2015

My top tips for self-care ♥

Lately I've been thinking a lot about self care and how important it is to make yourself a priority sometimes.  I've got 2 young children and 1 on the way and I've always felt that when I'm happy and at my best they thrive even more.


 

We're all human and I certainly have my bad days but I know that when I look after myself, whether it's eating and drinking well or getting a bit of head space to do something I love, these bad days are few and far between.

So here's what I try to commit to:
  • First and foremost, I try to keep life as simple as possible. This often means doing less, seeing less people, having less and saying no more often!  It is the one central thing that I've realised has a knock-on effect and in turn benefits us all as a family!  I got to a point where we were out everyday...I was packing too many things in; avoiding being at home; finding it a rush to get from here to there.  I'd come home to try to make dinner...which would end up late...with children at my feet upset and tired.  Stressful for everyone!  The washing was always behind because I just wasn't at home enough to do it.  Now I slow things down and make time for things that will make my life easier - such as making dinner earlier or taking the time to involve the children in preparing dinner.  I'm far from being as organised as I could be with things like washing but I'm certainly a lot less stressed than I was :-) Try slowing down; cramming less in; being a little more realistic with how much time you have in one day.  
  • Making time to look after myself.  Oh this is so important!  We all know that we should look after ourselves so that we can look after others but oh so often we get forgotten in amongst busy lives, every day stresses and looking after other people.  I truly believe that when you are at optimum health or even optimum emotional health, others around you will benefit and your life becomes easier.  I am guilty of forgetting myself every single day.  Today I've not made time to drink enough water or take my vitamins or paint my toenails!  But notice I say haven't made time? This is totally my challenge......a prioritising fail! I always believe you can make time for yourself, it's just about priorities.  It's something I'm still working on but at least the intention is there!  Have a little think about your priorities today - where are you putting yourself amongst other things in your life?  Do you think that other areas would improve if you could work on your emotional or physical health first?
  • Being available for our children - whilst also having boundaries. I have a bit of a bugbear about listening and I hate the thought that my children aren't getting what they need from me.  Again it comes back to self-care and is a fine balance between their needs and your needs.  I find that quite often I can try so hard to be a responsive, positive parent that actually our lives start to suffer.  This is because I don't find it easy to say no to the children! Not in the sense of spoiling them with toys or chocolate but just general everyday requests.  I'm sure you're familiar with how it goes; 'I need a drink'; 'Can I have X and then Y and then Z but I need them all right now?'; 'Can you get me X and Y and I need a poo and then can we make something out of a cardboard box?' :-D  As our eldest has got older I've been able to say to him, 'Whoah......I can only do one thing at a time......and I might just need to finish this first but I'll come straight after.'  And at almost 5 he's actually really good at waiting and understanding that I can't do everything...he perhaps has to choose one and then wait for the others.  Mum and I have talked about this lately and she says it's important for them to see that I need time to myself too and actually, in the end they will learn to respect those boundaries and I don't think that can be bad role modelling, self-care ;-)  I don't always make the time to really sit and play but I try to and otherwise always be available.  I think sometimes as a parent, if you can attend to a need quite quickly, it will often buy you time after that to do what you want or need to do for you!  
  • Taking time to step away from social media. It's so easy to spend time procrastinating...avoiding other tasks...and social media is the perfect excuse. There is so much out there to be interested in and to learn but it's also such a distraction. Sometimes I think it does us (or me in particular) good to not have so many outside influences; things we read, things we see other people doing, opinions we might be vulnerable to. And instead really think about looking inside at what we think instead - using our instincts. When there are opinions everywhere it can be hard to be strong enough every day to see past this. 
  • And that leads me on to my last one which is recognising when something is making me uncomfortable. Now and then I start to have a pang of insecurity or a yearning for more material items or more 'success' or more of something else. I realise now that this is coming from me - rather than anything that other people are doing. At this point I need to take a little look at my own confidence levels and remind myself that everything is just perfect as it is - I'm experiencing what I need to and if there's something I want, then I need to put that intention out there and go grab it!  
So self-care really is so important.  Whatever you love to do, whether it's go for lovely walks, be in the outdoors, dance, sing, read, write......go make some time to fit it in.  There is always time for everything, it's just a matter of prioritisation and YOU are important too :-)

Gemma xx

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2 comments:

  1. Hello, I follow you on Instagram and have now found you here too :)

    It is so important to look after yourself but it's something I think we are all guilty of not doing enough of, life is very busy but it's funny how much of a difference spending some time on yourself can make.

    Have a great week x x x

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    1. Hi Gem! Lovely to hear from you :-) Love your posts on Instagram, I long for that country life so am trying to inject a bit of it in to our fairly modern home! Have a great week too! xx Gemma

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